Two things of significance today:
1) John thinks my dialysis access in my arm is infected, so no dialysis today. Have to go have it checked
tomorrow. If "yes", it means 3 weeks of dialyzing "In Center"- where it is understaffed and every
PLEASE pray that John is wrong. (I cannot see any signs of infection, but we cannot risk it).
2) I had to tell Cedars that I am in no place psychologically to be "active" on the Transplant List. Y'al
l know I have been fighting with myself for awhile on this, but it came time to tell them. I was dead
honest, and was told that the Dr feels he is "uncomfortable with me as a patient right now" and that I
am now Status 7 (On Hold Nationally).
I took a huge risk telling them what I did, but felt I had to. I was being told about the "400 patients that
want a place in the 6 clinic appts we have available for the next month", and in good faith could not
take up another one from someone ready to go.
Most likely, we will be moving to a Paired Exchange unit anyway, but my fear that the notes of this
conversation and the things said will be put in my 'permanent file' terrifies me.
How will another unit look at me after seeing my Cedars file? Will another unit take me when I am
ready? The questions are weighing heavily right now.
I could sure use some prayer and support. I am really conflicted right now.
Well, that is the latest.
PS: Most updates are now handled through a Facebook page called "Operation Find a Kidney for Kelli". Feel free to request membership in the group. All are welcome.